Alright finally a day off! I've been working so hard these past few months, im acutually really proud of myself. But its still not nearly enough for march, when i got back to school full time. ugh. I'm going off to Nicaragua for 3 weeks in 4 days, im quite excited! Mostly because i get to get away from this place for a good while, clear my head, feel refreshed again.
but, why is it that when ever i get close to something, nothing ever happens. i look at what he has now, i feel like obviously im not good enough, or theres something wrong with me. I guess i did something wrong, i should of told him, but i didnt i'm a fucking idiot, that could be me right now. And now its too late. I guess i just have to sit here, and wait wait wait some more.

CHECK CHECK CHECK IT OUT!

I have two days off from work well almost just one. The day has passed and its been awesome.
I barley have time to just sit at home and do absoultely nothing, those fun lazy days spent in sweats and a tshirt. gah i love it.
Tommrow Jen and I are planing on visiting some old friends, or teachers. We're going down to your old middle school and visiting some of our favorite teacher, who i have not seen since i was in grade 9 about 4 years ago. Time flys really.
You signed, on your still on, but i dont have the nerve to open up the window, and type in letters H-I and hit enter. How can sucha simple thing be so hard? gah im stupid.

ALLO ALLO! Tommrow SECxCREW is gonna be working on yet another video, i'm excited.
Today me and JENNY JENNY! had a Poutine & Movie Night. Its our thing, we drive all the way to costco which is about 20 minute away, just to get poutines, be cause well they are the best damn poutines i've ever tasted!!! I Bought a awesome new hair straightner that is the best in canada, so it cost quite a bit. Tommrow is my last day off then back to work...damnn!

But as for you, i'm not really sure about you. Maybe i should ask you straight up, or maybe i should just leave it alone and let it die hopefully, not sure if its attraction or something else.

"Did you come up to me so your night would be cheaper?

Did you make up your mind about about me from the start?

Did you come here tonight to find something deeper?"
-Last night, CL.

so i was really bored. its 12:32am, so i made this blog thing.
i have a livejournal but i dont use it, i thought i would make one of these to vent
every once in a while about what i'm feeling. I really could careless if anyone reads this
its more to let it out then anything. Right now i'm hella tired only work 4.5 hrs got friday (er today) and saturday off stoaked, dont know what i'm doing. might be hanging with the bestie.
i know that i really want to see him, even though i dont want to. does that make any sense?
probably not. its like one of those things that you want but you know is not good for you. like.. for example eating mcdonalds, you have those cravings for it you want it so bad, but you know its hella not good for you, but no no you still wants so, you eventually go get some, then after you finsih up, your tummy hurts real bad and you fell like garbage. its the same thing.